Positive Thought Techniques for Anger Control

Have you ever heard the phrase “we are what we eat”? Well it should be “we are what we think”. Our thoughts if channelled correctly can be very powerful, for good or for bad.

It is very obvious how negative thoughts affect us. They can hold us back from being successful in our careers or any other endeavours we may dream about. You may have noticed that some people seem to naturally have the ability to do something while others hesitate, worry and tell all around them that they don’t think they will be able to do it. They put forward all kinds of reasons for this but fail to recognise that it is their own fear driven by their thought pattern that is really holding them back. The people who just get up and do things are not clouding their minds with negative thoughts and saying that they can’t, they just believe that they can.

The best way to change your thought pattern is to find a nice quiet place, take a few deep breaths and relax. Some call this meditation but if that’s not your cup of tea you can just call it relaxing and quietening the mind.

When you are at this stage you must think about your problem, in this case your reaction to events and people in your life that is manifesting as anger, you must imagine yourself calm and in control and repeat to yourself.

“I am calm, relaxed and in control of my emotions and reactions at all times of the day and under any circumstance I encounter.”

You can substitute this phrase with whatever feels most comfortable to you but you must repeat this to yourself 4-5 times a day when in this relaxed state. It is important for you to do this when you are relaxed because the mind is more open and receptive at this stage. Before you fall asleep at night is also a great time because then your mind will dwell on the thoughts all night. It is also very important to only repeat and think positive thoughts. If you do, it won’t be long before your subconscious mind picks up on this and your behaviour is modified.

This technique works, it works with anything not just controlling your anger. Try it!!

Another technique is to visualise your negative thoughts and resentments, make them separate from you. Picture whatever it is you don’t want anymore, whether it’s a thought, feeling, experience or behaviour.  The idea then is to put them outside of yourself-; you are taking them from within and moving them out so they are not yours anymore.  I like to visualise a horrible big brown balloon that is tied to me. This balloon represents all the negative feelings or emotions that I don’t want anymore. I basically cut it loose and watch if fly away.

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  1. Priya says:

    Good article thanks

  2. Sadanand Sutar says:

    One of the good articles on control of angers. The technique of visualising negative emotions with big brown balloon is innovative one! Thanks and all the best.

  3. sanjay says:

    very gud aricle..very simple and practicle..
    I hav one query..wht shld we do when we r very angry and we know it is going to burst? even if we r at right side?

    • admin says:

      If you know you are too angry and are about to burst, I would advise you to simply walk away from whatever is causing it and cool down. However, sometimes anger takes hold quickly and we have reacted before we engage our brains. Changing your behaviour is not something you can do over night and as long as you try, and you don’t hurt anyone, you should try using the experience to learn from, so that the next time you will have more control over your actions. If you do choose to walk away before exploding….feel proud of yourself and realise that you have just grown as a person.

  4. Daphne says:

    Thank you so much for a this solutions on anger management. But I have a query, I get angry too often without any reason and I flare up on people every now and then and threw someone elses temper on people who are close to me. Sometimes I dont even know what I am talking out of anger.Later, I sit and think what have I done and feel bad about it. But till then that person had already lost an impression on me.This usually happens with the people who are close to me.And,I feel I have become more of negative than positive because the environment that I have been brought up was completely negative and due to which this atitude is controlling me. Can you please help me in this as I dont want to loose people because of my anger,atitude and thoughts.

    • admin says:

      Hi Daphne, I think that you should really try and leave the situation before you lose control. Get away from it and stay on your own until you have calmed down and have thought rationally about what happened and about how you want to behave. It is most important to catch yourself very early and realise that you are angry, because once you start to explode it is so much harder to gain your composure.

  5. I also have this serious anger controling me at times i might just look at a person and feel very angry. Pls help me how can i improve and get rid of this attitude cos i usually feel awful after every outburst

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